So my little one is not the most extroverted kid on the block. Those in the know (namely other parents that I randomly meet at the mall or at the local coffee shop jumping castle) tell me that this is somewhat typical of children of this age. Two year olds are just not that social. They tend to engage in parallel play, where they play alongside each other, rather than engaging directly with each other. Sounds plausible to me... kind of. It would certainly explain why she is happy to play on equipment when kids of her age or younger are on. It would also explain her tendency when older kids get onto the jumping castle - the tendency to get off and go play on the slide. And if there are older kids on the slide and the jumping castle... well then she would rather sit on my lap and partake of my drink and food. But I also believe that a large portion of my child's responses to other human beings is that she is simpy a rather shy little being. Whenever people approach her, she tends to look at them coyly through her eyelashes and buries her head in whichever one of my body parts happen to be closest to her. She will greet people when prompted by dad or myself, and will often even give a beautiful little smile, but all of this from the comfort of my arms or lap.
Don't get me wrong. She is not rude. This is not a little kid who is refusing to interact because she is simply ignoring you. She is very clearly just shy and takes an hour (or three) to warm up to people sufficiently to interact with them. However, through all of her warm-up time she is incredibly sweet and endearing and flirtatious. This is why when she refused to respond to the hostess of the house that we visited yesterday, I knew that something was up!
When we arrived at the house she was reluctant to respond to the charming lady in any way. She then proceeded to walk laps around the pool and in the garden (she LOVES gardens)... with me in tow. She would not venture out on her own to complete her laps and would not respond to the advances of the adults or the two children there who were trying to engage her in play. She was tempted by the blocks and the funky Pooh train that played unique tunes for each character but she was not interested in anything for longer than two seconds. Eventually she simply refused to move away from me at all. I started to realize that this little being was starting to heat up. I had no thermometer - no scientific way in which to rpove that my child was not well but there was one simple measure - she was adamant that she wanted my love and attention, lots of it, with no concern for where we were and who was watching. She would do nothng else but sit on my lap and cuddle. She tried to sleep but that wasn't really the purpose of the situation. She felt bad and didn't care who knew it. There was no forcing herself to play because there were social obligations to be met. There was no forcing herself to be friendly just because we were visiting people that she had only ever met once before and wanted to make an impression. She only knew how to be herself - a sick self that wanted to feel better - a self who knew that to be cuddled and kissed by mommy was going to go a long way to make herself feel better.
Even after we got home, all that little girl did was lie in my arms. She insisted on 'miminhos' (a Portuguese word that has no perfect translation but is probably equivalent to TLC) and would not move off the couch. There was no need to be anything but who she is and to request all that she required from the people who could provide it. Such wisdom!!! Where does it come from and when do we lost it?
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